Competitive peekaboo

I was playing peekaboo with the little guy in the stroller in my work today (and winning too... I think; what's the scoring system for peekaboo?), when one of my co-workers asked "So when are you going to have one Ty?"  The answer is no time soon.  It's a very definite answer.  But the thing is, the one thing I know I want in life is to one day be a father.  There are lots of things I've wanted; that I think I want now; that I know I want now; that I think I will want when I'm older, but the only constant thing I've known about what I want out of life is that I want to be a father.

All those results, but no helpful scoring system.  If you have any ideas on a scoring system, write them in the comments; we can set up a pro league!

Every so often I get very anxious about fatherhood, because when I look around at my circle of friends and acquiatences, of the ones who I know have been abused, either physically or mentally, neglected, or just downright treated like shit, in the vast majority of cases, it's the father who's been the abusive one.  Really, only one friend pops to mind where it's the mother, and even then, it's the friend's stepmother, and if I've learned anything from Disney movies, it's that stepmothers are supposed to be evil.  Oh, and racism; Disney is good at teaching that as well.

I know that it's ignorant to assume that hardly anybody in my circle of friends have abusive mothers, and especially ignorant to assume I am aware of all of the abuse present within these parent-child dynamics.  I'm not assuming these things, believe me.  But sometimes, I think of these things, and then seriously start worrying about whether I'll be a good father.

I'm fortunate to be able to say that both of my parents have been wonderful to both my sister and I.  Certainly not perfect, they both have their annoyances and on occasion irk me (but as parents, that's pretty much their job), but I've never for one second doubted their love and devotion to the two of us.  I also realize it's a bit silly to worry about these things at a time when I don't want kids.  Who knows how I will have changed by the time I'm ready to have kids (twin girls, and then a boy by the way)?  There's no sense worrying about it now, but I still do.

Writing about this is helping to take my mind off of something that I shouldn't even really be thinking about, which is nice.  Reading Kat Von D's "The Tattoo Chronicles" is a nice distraction as well.

On the left is Nikki Sixx; the right is Natasha Kai.

The piece in the center of Kai's back is my favourite in the book so far (It's Kai's only soccer-related tattoo.  The text translates to "Believe".)  Gosh I would love to get a Kat Von D piece; I haven't the foggiest idea what could do her work justice though.  It would have to be something intricate, and I'd want her to take lots of artistic license with it.  Hell, maybe when I do have kids, I'll look into a piece for them; there's something to consider.